August 11th has meaning for my immediate family. That is the day it started in 1984 (if you can't figure it out that means it is my parents' anniversary). For me personally, it is the day that I crossed the Mason-Dixon line, to become a resident in North Carolina. My purpose: to become a teacher at Rockingham Middle School and fulfill my dream of having a personal impact on students. Instead, it was a year for personal reflection and growth. (With most of the learning taking place recently).
For one, my philosophy of disciple in teaching has taken a shift. I expected respect, I anticipated the immediate obedience, and I felt that as the authority, students should just follow my lead. They would want to learn, they would join together with limited structure, and they would thrive with less of my personal effort and more of there own energies. That is the dream I had, and boy was it a fantasy. I did have an impact on students in my short 3 months, but wish it could have lasted.
However, I have not given up, I have committed to adjustments and changes. I want to encourage students to learn, set goals, and fulfill a purpose. My goal is to structure my lessons in the appropriate ways that make them desire to do this. I have not yet been given a job that will let me complete this task, but I am in conversations with a local Christian school and just had an interview for a split social studies teacher for a pair of high schools about an hour away. We will see what God has in store.
Because I have yet to land a job teaching, I have had much more time to learn about who I am and get back into running, at least in the last two months. According to my records, I have run over 45 miles, hiked a mountain, and done hundreds of calisthenics. I have adjusted what I consume and changed my diet, in part, because of the encouragement of others. I have swum many laps in the pool, just to stay cool. The fun part is that I get to walk to work, giving me time to call people, think, or just enjoy a peaceful time from electronics (that ten minutes is pretty nice, unless it is too humid...lol) I have also been reading more and developing myself intellectually as well.
The books are not just for my mind, but also for Spiritual growth, a highly essential part of development. I have been reading books that have been given to me by my former pastor here at Rockingham Wesleyan Church. He gave me 10 books, and all but one deal with leadership and church management. Apparently he saw something in me, because I was approached by the chairman of the church board to fill in as the Sunday evening service director, I was also asked to teach the teen Sunday School class, IF we get a pastor with a family that has teens. I have been reading and digesting books: Soulshift, 21 Irrefutable Law of Leadership, and The 21 Most Powerful Minutes in a Leader's Day. Needless to say, I am learning a lot; knowing that I have a long way to go to be the man I need to be as a leader. I certainly have attributes and skills that make me a developing leader, but I can definitely be better (*always).
The biggest thing I have changed this crazy year is my ability to "step-up". After leaving RMS, I learned that I didn't always speak out at the right time; I didn't always do what was best for the team, because I knew what I thought was best for me. Leading the Sunday evening services given me the opportunity to seize the day and speak thoughtful things. I have spoken on persistence in prayer (especially for a new pastor) and "why are you here" from Elijah hiding in the desert. These lessons give me more courage to share my personal struggles and show where I can take part in filling roles that the pastor cannot (since we do not have one at this moment). I have been told that my words have been encouraging, well-timed, and provoking. I also have filled leadership roles in work, now that I have learned how things operate. I have independently run the pass twice, but the biggest thing is I have gotten to run two inspections (we just scored 99.5 on Thursday). The inspector kept telling me to keep up the good work and that we did a better job than francizes that have better SOPs. The best thing he said was: "Your boss must really trust you, he never let anyone else run the inspections." The law of timing is coming to fruition.
God knows what the next year holds. I love it here: I have made some friends (but they live in the cities at least 90 min away now, though) I have made a difference, but not in the way I expected. My plan is to stay in Rockingham, NC, unless God tells me otherwise. Right now, I must teach the members of my church, encourage them, and share what God tells me. That is what is now. I cannot prepare for the future, unless I trust God and listen when He gives me the opportunity to step up. It may be in a new teaching position in Stanly County or it might be in a private Christian School nearby. But right now it is in my church and at Pattan's. Let God use you now, and the future will care for itself. I cannot wait to see what happens.
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