Evaluating the Inventory

This past year and one half have been life-altering and simply interesting.  I have learned that while being a stick in the mud can be enjoyable for a time, sometimes an individual can change, for a positive.  Not saying that everything I have done is wonderful, or even great for that matter, but I know that I have completed shifts in my resolve to be resolute. Still posted on my corkboard in my kitchen are the list of 8 changes that I decided to focus on this year.  Those were certainly some major shifts that began to actually take place, some more than others, but at least I kept to my commitment.

I now I could have done better, seeing I have probably been out of this recliner for about an hour of the 7 that I have been home since church this morning.  It was in church that Pastor reminded us to evaluate our lives, goals, and beliefs, as we walk through everyday, but specifically here at the end of the year when it is common to set "resolutions" for the upcoming year.  He mentioned how the United States professes to be about 70% Christian, yet more than half of those individuals are "in name only".  It is important for each one of us to be on our guard and focus on shifts/decisions that need to be made to bring us closer in our relationship to God and other believers.  That was certainly on my mind as I evaluated the choices I made with regard to my list.

I did very well with being straightforward and being much more expressive, which has allowed me to increase/solidify my relationships with other believers, even some with differing systems of thought.  The best thing I did this year was begin Paying It Forward, especially at Shippensburg Produce and Outreach, in tipping and handing out free tickets for Frosties.  The last time I did it was Saturday, and the look on those young families' (especially the little girl) faces, is priceless. Handing out the bracelets each time I do it, has proved to be a wonderful tool in spreading cheer and happiness, hopefully they continued the passing of good deeds.  I also know that without trying to improve this area of my life I would never have consented to relinquishing my role as a learner and becoming a Sunday School Teacher. Or so I thought I was relinquishing that role; I was enhancing it, because I knew that I had to return to my CEF roots and relearn all I knew to make it understandable for the elementary children.  It is awesome the new information that I have learned by hearing the reason the students give for Jesus coming to Earth, why to be a friend, and performing Christmas plays after a month of Sundays spent practicing.  Along with that I am trying to teach them to grow in prayer as I have, but that is probably a lesson for later.

I myself have improved in that area, but I still have to remember that Everything works out when we listen to God (Romans 8:28).  Something I am certainly needing to work on, but I know that as I pray and hand things over to His care, He will be faithful to help me in all circumstances, not just the ones I want help in.  But I can choose my attitudes and perspectives in every situation...as my friend Amy pointed out. "Will this be important a year from now?...Do I really need to worry that much about it."   Just being positive can change everything.  I know I am still working on placing my passions through productive emotions, but since being called out (last month) on my "anger" at work, I have certainly reached positive progress...

Yet there are many, many more things that must be adjusted/drastically changed for me to be more well-rounded, kind, and loving.  I know that I am nice to everyone, unless they don't listen to me or allow at least some credence when I speak.  I shared this with a friend who dared poke into my wound further to define the real cause:  selfish pride.  Not just the "WHOOOOOOO---HOOOO-I-am-awesome" type of pride, but the deep down I-know-better-than-you-do kind. I don't feel I belittle people, but I have now been told that people are scared of me (thanks...it was truly a wake-up).  Yet it was not really what I expect to hear, since I cannot even see that about myself (silly nohari window blind spot http://kevan.org/nohari?).  It is just that I figured that if I didn't think about it (my anger) it would go away...and that is why my past decisions still come into play so often.  I played the role of the insensitive, intolerant individual so well, that I began to become those qualities without seeing it; but I know now how to fix it, and have been letting God do it, with the help of near and far away friends praying for me.  That is my one major goal for life-changing directionality shifts.

My second major resolve is due in part to my reading of Robert Rogers book, Into the Deep, which is available from his ministry Mighty in the Land. (http://files.tyndale.com/thpdata/FirstChapters/978-1-58997-378-7.pdf).  He came and spoke at Roxbury Holiness Camp, and the message hit me hard and stuck with me:  Give everything to God, Live with no regrets, and Make memories with the special people in your life.  (Wow...it still gives me the chills, just trying to imagine how he dealt with everything that happened to him and his family.)  Simple, yet profound; easy to say, yet even harder for me to do.  I have surely begun to work on the memories part already (a 5k and a 10k with Megan Hahner this year), and I plan to finally meet Amy Sickles face-to-face on the 4th of January...but I certainly can do more to improve in that area.  It is those other two that I specifically offer as a challenge to anyone who reads this post:  Let God control ALL of your life, and Live focusing forward only.  God knows what happened, and He has a plan to care for you, in every step of the way.  I still have plenty of regrets that I must lay to rest, but I know that with God's help and guidance, those things with definitely be put to rest sooner that later...within the next year.  It is time for me to stop putting it off.  God has already blessed me with a good job and loyal Christian friends, it is past time to allow Him to bless me with what he has prepared in advance (Ephesians 2:10 ).  Perhaps I will get a jump start by purchasing Rogers guide to living without regrets, but before that happens I can launch myself into better devotional and prayer time with God.  Yet in taking a full inventory, I know I am missing some things.

Do I continue to find new things to learn?  Not enough.  Do I read  like I used to?  Not with the internet distraction (Facebook and online programs).  Should I visit/call/Skype friends more?  Probably, yes.  Should I exercise/run more?  You bet!  Nap?  less...lol. I certainly need to get out of the apartment-to-job and job-to-apartment pattern of laziness.  Should I cook for myself more?  For sure..(Although eating out is ok.)  Should I be more clean/organized?   YES, hands down.  Should I focus more on my work and use more effort?  Definitely!  Should I become who God wants me to be?  That is the plan.  Could I go on?  Yes, but I won't....because reading it would be tedious, but these questions are to start your critical thinking.  Hopefully I stirred your neurons and got you thinking about resolving to be resolute about the future, giving you a platform from which to launch, and add more to you inventory in the next year.

Happy New Year!
Joeyb

Ya Gotta Wanna

This post is for thinking about how much God wants to be Immanuel (With Us).  If we take time to read the Scriptures, it is obvious that God loves us (Jeremiah 31:3, Romans 5:8, Ephesians 2:4-5) and he desires fellowship with us (1 Corinthians 1:9).  God has given us the opportunity to reciprocate that love.  We are given a choice if we would like to return it, as he will always love us, but we can choose not to as well.  God has given us the free will to choose Him over following another, and he as been the closest to us as he has ever been.

God walked with Adam and Eve in the Garden, but when they broke that fellowship by sinning against Him and disobeying His rules, God only made a few appearances to righteous men.  He came to Abraham many times, walked in front of the former slaves guiding them, spoke with the prophets giving them signs and warnings, and sent his angels at other times throughout the Old Testament.  The Israelites, his people, needed Him to bring them words and statements of comfort, but at times they missed God's warnings or refused to heed.  Yet all those centuries between Adam and Mary (14 generations times 3), God was waiting to fulfill his promise to Eve at the proper time.  When that time came, Jesus would walk among us.  We celebrate that occurrence around Christmas time.

Now think about the Olympic Athlete.  Each one works toward a specific goal, a certain race, that all comes down to the one chance on the biggest stage.  These men and women focus on the minute details and the big picture and work tirelessly to become "the best".  While it may come naturally to some and they may not have to work as vigorously, everyone still has to work to get closer and closer to the goals of success and a gold medal.  These individuals want to win, they want to achieve, they want to be the best they can be, to beat the others that believe that they are the best.  Their dreams carry them, their motivation is always different, but each athlete has the same focus.

The want to work, because they know that the end result will probably be amazing and potentially record breaking.  Our desire to be with God should surpass the desires these athletes have.  He gave up everything to be Immanuel (Philippians 2) just so that He would be closer to us.  No longer do we have to go to a priest to speak with God, BUT we still must choose to spend time with Him.  We must choose wisely how we spend our moments, how we live, and how God becomes the force that moves our lives.  We gotta wanna allow Him to have that complete control.

Just like the athlete, who wants that medal so badly he will do whatever it takes (within reason or not) to achieve,  it takes time and effort to learn to let go of our problems, issues, and circumstances and let God have complete control.  While it can happen overnight, it is not always the case.  God works on us, but we gotta wanna let Him  God sent his son to be with us, so that the Holy Spirit could come and dwell among us.  We are his children, and he takes us back when we fall, but we gotta wanna let Him do his bidding.  We gotta wanna follow his leading and be willing to do what he asks of us, IF we want his promised blessings.  And not just in the good times either, in the hard times it may be harder, but we gotta wanna trust God even more.  We must fully rely on his loving-kindness and patience as He molds us.  Yet before this transformation can take place, we gotta wanna let him do it.

Sure we will struggle at times, there will be problems, but we can have peace, as God is "with us."  Jesus promised many things to his disciples.  One that I cling to most often is in John 16:33 where Jesus says this: "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”  God is greater than our struggles and fears.  Our hearts gotta wanna allow Him to care for our struggles, we must turn our hearts toward our Heavenly Home and be heaven-minded, because the fourth quarter is coming.  While this is not a post about the last days, it is important to note that we draw nigh the time of Jesus' return.  When that happens God will no longer walk on this earth "with us", as he has for the past 2,000 years, but rather we will either be taken to walk with Him in Heaven or be separated forever from Him.   Yet, for now we gotta wanna bring our minds to focus on God, our hearts to desire His will, and our bodies to follow the direction the Holy Spirit leads.

God has had this plan for the last 6,000 years, we cannot thwart what He has set in motion.  We just need to learn to follow Him, and we cannot do it, if we are not willing.  We must choose to loyally follow his guidance and be led to his throne, until he comes for us.  Faithfully serving God will bring benefits beyond our understanding, but we gotta wanna.  It is just that complexly simple...or as Nike says "Just Do It".  Ya just gotta wanna.